So....About that Blogging More Thing....

Ha! Whoops. Almost 2020!! Lots has happened. I got married. Holy cow!!!! 36 and married. Finally. I am a step mom to two kiddos. (They are awesome, let me tell you)...Quit my job, got a new job, dad went to the hospital the week inbetween, Grandma had a toe removed, other grandma turned 90. Sold my house. Moved into my husband's house. Redecorating...selling things, buying new things. We had someone else pull the wallpaper down in the main part of the house (no way was I doing that crap, nothankyou!) Painted it, bought new furniture. ALL THE THINGS!

One thing I kinda forgot about was...well, ME. After trying so hard to get healthy, finally achieving that goal, maintaining for a while, then everything just fell apart for me. Very slowly, of course. But, I'm not happy where I'm at. People, I know what to do. So, I'm going to do it. Right here on the blog. First up, food change. I'm going back on the Jason Pearson Diet. It worked before, I love it, and it is an amazing program for sure! Then I will start running again.

Today is Year Three of being medication free with Crohn's Disease! Fitting day to start at square 2. (Not square 1, that was ugly, painful, and just a complete disaster). Backstory:

I was really sick, and really tiny for way too long. In 2011, I finally had a bunch of tests, including an endoscopy, colonoscopy, and a CT scan. I had ulcers in my large colon. Went on Prednisone (OMG never again) and a big pill (times 4) called Lialda. Insurance wouldn't pay for that, so doc switched me to Apriso. Same stuff, different brand. Insurance companies are 'funny' like that. I was on that stuff for 5 years. Still had issues. Doc said I might have to have surgery to fix the problem because he couldn't figure out how to help me. Of course, food is hardly ever mentioned, except to tell me that what I eat doesn't matter.

What? No. Food matters. So much. It is either the base of your health, or the base of your disease. Then I fired him. Not the first doctor to be fired by me, probably won't be the last. I'm not going to listen to your gibberish if you don't actually care or try to help me. Pushing medications and surgery at me when there are other options is unacceptable. I hired a new doctor to do a colonoscopy in 2016 after I felt that I had healed up enough to get one. Turns out that's a huge game changer! It was my 3rd colonoscopy to date. Everything was fine except one tiny little ulcer that I couldn't even feel. New Doc was like, well there's your Crohn's! Uhm....no. There's 2016 year of hell all balled up into one tiny little spot that will be gone in a month. (Whatever).

He didn't even know what to do with me because I was so healthy. I think he thought I would need major work since I fired the other one. Nope. He sent me another thing for a follow up colonoscopy two years later. I'm not doing that. You are not going to make me pay almost $2,000 every 2 years to 'see' what's up there. I'll tell you when I need you because I know my body better than you do.

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When I started JPD, I lost about 20 pounds. Held that at bay for quite a while. Now? I'm back up 30. Dang it. I'm addicted to sugar. Oh man. That habit is hard to kick. But I'm going to do it! Just as I type this, my coworker told me there is apple pie and banana bread in the kitchen for everyone....working in an office of 80+ people is going to be rough...but so much better than the last place I was at! 2019 has been a year full of new things!

Here's to losing 30ish pounds and getting back into running 10ks and half marathons!

Two Posts in one week?

I know, right? What just happened? ;-) Ha.

This week has been a little easier than the last. Kind of. Less tears, more sullen, I suppose.

Yesterday, I met some of my family at Toast in Lincoln for supper. I don't think they have a thing on the menu that I haven't liked so far! I got the Caesar Wrap with chicken. So good! They overdid it with the black olives...just a few do the trick! I felt like I was a little too sullen that day. :-( I'm trying, but things are still really hard right now.

My ex's parents are married to different people, so I felt like I lost two families when we split up. I feel like he took the rug out from underneath me and the floor disappeared. The free-fall isn't so startling this week, but it's still present. We are supposed to meet for dinner one night this week or next, hopefully that will be a positive thing. I want to help, but I can't. My grief right now is very great and raw. I'm not sure how to navigate this 'friend' thing yet, I'm not sure what that means to me.

My mom posted the quote, 'What if I Fall? Oh my Darling, What if you Fly?' My wings may be broken, but since Halloween is coming up, I guess I need to find myself a broomstick to make up for what I lack right now. ;-) I'm not sure what that means, but I'll figure it out.
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On the Crohn's front:  It was a little bit of a struggle this week. I left so quickly over the weekend, I didn't really think about packing proper food for myself. You would think hanging out with a bunch of farmers would mean at least some sort of vegetable. ;-) I loaded up on salsa and things like that, so it wouldn't be a total catastrophe! I am feeling the effects of that weekend. Lots of water and good food this week to counteract it.

Oh, and I am so irritated. I was supposed to have a beef brisket for my lunches this week, but the only briskets I found were HUGE and cost $45 and above!! What?? C'mon guys. I realize that beef brisket is something that you only buy for huge parties, but I digress. Sigh. Next time I'll do a little more digging. I only went to one grocery store because I was in a hurry.

My running needs some work. I am being lazy, and it's showing!! It's staying darker in the mornings and it's hard to get up and just get it done! I need some motivation.